Page 23 - Bodhayanti Parasparam Vol 7

BODHAYANTI PARASPARAM – VOL 7
comes a stage, when all thoughts are gone but awareness pure and simple stays. There I have invariably found a calm and peaceful stillness that is remembered as a slight jolt. The ripples observed around the ‘eye’ of stillness leaves me dumb and awe stuck. Here on recall it is found the mind stopped functioning and with it are gone all ideas and beliefs, notions and aspirations; all mind stuff is gone. The awareness of self is totally destroyed. In the initial stages there was a sense of what may be termed as apprehension of loss of self identity. On later occasions of such deep absorption there emerged the clarity of vision. However this kind of clarity in the beginning lasted temporarily and I landed back in the plane of individual identity patching up the damaged belief systems. This resulted in seeking for that state where the mind stuff is all but gone. This is the cause of restlessness even after vision of the absolute state. Repeatedly the vision is sought and had and thus the belief systems assiduously developed and owned were given up in the void of Being. This is a painful process of annihilation of the creations of the self. I
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