Page 108 - Bodhayanti Parasparam Vol 6

Bodhayanti Parasparam Vol 6
pray for strength to carry on things. Also used to think do I have any relationship with “Kunthi in Mahabharatam”? In fact, there was a time, when I talked to HIM, saying that HE has to get tired by giving issues and I will not get tired or bored, as long as HE allows me to be physically present in this body. I know it is my arrogance and expression of ego, but it is my nature not to budge for pressures. In fact, more the pressure, more I become strong. However, I did this on one condition that HE should ensure that I get what I want i.e., my goal and nothing less than that.
I have a feeling that HE hears when we say something with our heart. I have an incident to quote- Once, before joining this system, I casually asked my mother whether it is possible for her to make a gold chain for me, knowing fully my lower middle class background. Next moment she took out two of her gold bangles and asked me to get a chain. She did not have much gold and cash to spare except 4/5 bangles. Later on, I was unable to bear her selfless love, I contemplated, what is that I can give her in return. She taught me all the virtues of life, which include, spiritual stories, integrity, selfless service, sacrifice, duty, endurance, sharing and finally dependence on God, right from my childhood. She was a chronic asthma patient and suffered for over 20 years. Having not interested in any physical / material items, I prayed GOD to transfer some quantity of her disease to me, so that she can get some relief. I did not opt for total quantity perhaps I may be selfish. After 10-15 days or so, I got it. This incident gave me total happiness, one way I established a contact with divine and secondly I was able to repay a little bit of “matru runam”. After that she survived for over 10 years.
Actually my understanding is that one should go through the suffering irrespective of the reason and
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