Page 126 - Three Truths - Trillion Doubts - Volume -II

something.
46. Behaving in unbalanced way at times based on suden impulse. It was, however, very much regulated during the last 3-4 years.otherwise it used to be calm & balanced. Dependency on the Master continued to increase.
Do you mean to say after meditation it has become worse. If that is so you should rethink about continuing meditation. I am sure that is not the position and it is odd notions you have that are at play. Dependency for what? If you are really feeling dependant on the Master the earlier sentence makes no sense.
47. I seem to get into lot of problems because of unnecessary talks. Although I don’t intend to do any harm to others, they think that way & I feel very hurt. I was also reminded by the Master during meditation that unless there is any need to talk, I should maintain silence.
The fish gets into troubles because of its open mouth. There is a saying do not disturb silence unless you are going to improve on that.
More on Sadhana:
1. So long as the sailing is smooth there is no problem and it is only when sails are to be handled and the helm kept firm the readiness of the sadhaka for the journey is known.
2. Regarding the problems in sadhana that you mentioned they are faced by all the aspirants at some stage of life or the other and that cannot be any reason for losing our persevering efforts in the path chosen by us. Ebb and tides are as common to the mind as to the sea and a balanced approach is what is required which I am sure you have. Kindly read more of Masters works and you find many of your problems answered there.
3. It is a general rule in any learning process that there will be a stage similar to the plateau after some improvement. This period of lull or relative sloth is the period of internal consolidation. Again the curve of learning picks up. Patience and perseverance are the means. Please gird up your loins as Master puts it. It is a bad habit to expect results for action and that conditions you into a pattern of thinking which is usually considered not healthy. Your duty is to do sadhana as prescribed and leave the results to the will of Master. There are obviously other things that work on your feelings and emotions and all I can advise is to pray