Page 177 - Three Truths - Trillion Doubts - Volume -II

Nature of Knots
1. Meditations: (a) All my meditations are a service to the Master. (b) He is always around. He moves everything. Everything belongs to Him. (c) Vibrations in the heart region and in the head. (d) I always end up crying when so ever I get the thought "Where are you Master?" I feel I miss Him at that time. This is happening at least once or twice a week for the past one month.
All these feelings are good and show that you have the grace of the Master. Do not you think that the item (d) above does not vibe with the item (b). Master is with us in our heart and all that we are doing in sadhana is to make His place pure. Crying is because of the associated emotional thoughts about the Master. When nothingness is our goal and that is the Master what emotions are possible? But what you feel is a feeling of many aspirants and may indicate your movement in knot 3.
2. Meditations: (a) My heart belongs to the Master, my atma belongs to the Master, and whole of me belongs to the Master. (b) These above feelings come in quick succession and thereafter the whole of heart and mind region start resonating. (c) Feel like continuing even when half an hour is over.
These thoughts indicate your journey through the Knot 2.
3. Morning Meditations: On some days it used to be calm but not peaceful. Felt some activity going on continuously. Sometimes felt Divine Light (Light without luminosity) is not stable but drifting. Soon after completion of meditation, on few days I felt a lot of relief getting into excellent peaceful condition. It, however, used to be quite absorbing. On some other days I used to be continuously attentive to the Divine Light (Light without luminosity) through out. Absorbency used to be high. After meditation on those days, there used to prevail devotional attitude sometimes it continues for a long time. On a few days thoughts relating recent events used to dominate. At times I used to be carried away by them for a short while. With some effort I used to return to Divine Light (Light without luminosity). Sometimes same type of thought used to recur. On other days, thoughts used to be few & insignificant. On very few days absorption used to be quite high leading to a stage of "unawareness" for a minute or so.