Page 122 - Three Truths - Trillion Doubts - Volume -II

than it used to be: I am getting old and tired.
Other words for old and tired are mature and seasoned. Blasting anger or rage is usual in all sensitive persons. The question would be was it justified or not? If there is no anger and passion in life there will be no life at all.
30. Whenever I remember Him consciously during the day, I feel a flow in Chit.
That is not correct understanding of the nature of chit lake. All our thoughts are there in seed form. Read and understand more about its nature and then know your origin of thoughts.
31. The yearning to grow fast in the system is ofcourse there, but I wonder whether I am resorting to fast track by posing this query.
Your question is based on simple Greed. Brahma Vidya has been made simple and easy for the first time by the Master and your desire to have quicker progress is not in any way justified.
32. Difficulties in sadhna: Complacency, Laziness, poor posture, lot of day to day thoughts, tendency to hold on to money leading to miserliness, Delaying day to day work.
If you are determined to get rid off these lazy habits and delusions then you can get rid off them. They are not problems in sadhana; they are your lazy habits and other afflictions. Please do decide your goals and then you will have courage to tackle these attitudes and habits.
33. Others (in monthly report): (a) There is more and more helplessness and inner cry to become free but not able to come out of it as have many bindings. (b) Feeling that Master is always helping and His grace and guidance is there always helping to come out. (c) Sometimes not able to say No. Trying not to get involved in unnecessary things or matters, reducing gossips. (d) Mostly feeling balanced and happy as well as more free and natural in dealing with others. (e) Sometimes feels that don't have control over self and end up wasting time watching TV or indulging in unnecessary activities.
When helping hand is there, there is no point in crying 'help', 'help' without